the past

The past!

Dear Neighbors,

Obviously a relationship takes a lot of effort. You got two people, two thoughts, two experiences and a lot of trouble lurking around the corner, ready to interrup.

To keep a relationship working there are a lot of do’s and don’ts. Today i will write about a big DON’T!

Almost everybody gets into a relationship with a past. Except with your first love. That’s another ‘fairytale gone bad’- story. I admire people who really get to the ‘ till death do us part‘ end with their first love, cause that’s dope!

Anyway, when you starting to like someone, first things first, the investigation! All men and women investigate their soon to be partner. Don’t worry, questions will be asked about you. If you already asked around or winkle out his/her life by observing their online actions, you can make a decisions for yourself to make this person a part of your future, or not.

If you start a new relationship it supposed to be a fresh start, right? Then why is it that as soon as we feel comfortable enough, we start asking questions about the past? Especially women feel the need to be asking about: ‘with Who, When and how Many. DON’T!

If you DO want to know all the “dirt” about someones past, you’ll have to face some problems who will come with it, because almost every default you’ll have with this person, will remind you about the “negative”.

You see to many times, that someones past take control over their future. This make people either end up back at square 1 again or arguing a lot. It’s after a failed relationships you’ll get to realize, how many discussions you had where someones past was brought up. We call someones past “The Past“for a reason, you know.

Really people, why do we wanna know about how many fucks was giving and with who? You already know you’re not gonna like the answers. People will always lie about their past anyway. ‘What you don’t know, will not kill you‘, they say.

 

My advice for every single one of you is:

 

Don’t let someones “failed” past ruin YOUR present!

 

Love… BellaThe1

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Use Protection!

Dear Neighbors,

We all know that sex sells, and why not? Sex is supposed to be fun and nice, (supposed to be). However, since people are not taking sex as serious as they should be,…

I would like to give you guys some ‘ADVICE’ from time to time. :-)

I guess unprotected sex has been on SALE for a while now, cause haven’t you noticed that there are a lot of “-baby -trapped -daddy’s” walking around? Too many boys and girls are taking big risks by not using condoms (i’m really on repeat mode). I know condoms are not cheap, but if you can’t afford buying condoms, you are not supposed to afford having sex either!

 
Condoms are a lot cheaper than child support. You better know that! Do you know what’s also “cheap”? Passing forward STD’s! That my people, you’ll get for free.

You can get a STD just by kissing someone (Herpes, Hepatitis B and Syphilis for example). Can you imagine kissing someone – exchange spittle – and feel something itching on your lips later? Before you even notice,  you’ll have a third eye on your lip, and this one is staring at people.

The worse people are those who are aware of having a STD and still have unprotected sex. You are playing with others health and life bro’.

People feel ashamed to visit the doctor when they notice that something aint right, not thinking about the fact that ‘the doctor has seen it ALL’. Stop acting so careless with other people’s life. If you don’t want to take the walk of shame to your doctor, then…

USE PROTECTION‘!!!

 

Love… BellaThe1

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Teenagers and Social Media. (Meisjes spreken af met vreemde via Facebook) MUST WATCH!!

This is what happens daily with teenagers and Social Media, watch Coby Persin’s video, especially the parents! (Click on link below)

Spreken tienermeisjes echt af met jongens die ze nog maar een paar dagen via internet ‘kennen’? De Amerikaan Coby Persin probeerde het – met goedkeuring van de ouders van een paar tieners – uit.

Watch: Meisjes spreken af met vreemde via Facebook: dit gebeurt er

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The Power of Social Media!

Dear Neighbors,

It’s really getting ridiculous!

A “like” on Instagram can actually make you someones bitch nowadays. As soon as you like someone on Instagram, people gonna talk. I’ll tell you why:

The ones who gossip about you are mostly the ones who know nothing about you. An online action from you, got them “thinking” they all know you. Bitch you don’t know shit (excuse my french)! I could be liking a lamp, hanging behind the person, as far as you know. A like does not immediately means you want someone (at least for me it doesn’t, i don’t know about ya’ll). :-)

BUT….. i must say: ‘We are all aware of the power social media has to be starting some shit.’ If there is a back and forth interaction, people are gonna assume things. Social media got us all connected to people we would never meet without it. You can get attention from stars by just tagging their ass online.

Our options of “finding someone we like” has become gigantic. People are even falling in love with persons they have only see on pictures. Attention: ‘You are in love with a picture!!’ We really need some Nev and Max over here in holland, because we got a lot of Catfishes too.

Social media got us giving away our number to people we would usually run away from. What you see online is not always what you get, and it’s not only the men who got this issue but we women too. Men are pretty good in pretending to be something they’re not. I think people who pretend, are acting before thinking, didn’t you think you will see the person in real life, eventually?

You can’t trust nobody online these days, remember that! If you meet someone online:


1: Make sure you guys call each other once in a while, you don’t want to be Erik Hartman when you finally meet.


2: If you can’t call each other you can send voice memo’s. At least to hear the voice behind the letters.


3: Videochat! If someone is on Social Media, this person can videochat. There is really no excuse to not be videochatting with all the possibilities. You can even videochat on Facebook. This can make sure his/her face is real ;-).

 

Really people, catfish is so 2014. Stop it! If you fall for it anyways, you’re dumb, sorry!

 

So,… when i have a boyfriend, this social media thing, it most certainly gonna be…

 

‘a Discussion- of a Problem- we need to Solve’.

 

Love… BellaThe1

 

PS: Voor vertaling in NL klik hier >>>> Facebook: Dear Neighbors

 

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Dear Neighbors,

What happened to late night phone calls and going on dates? It has become something that only the older generation does and not even all of them.

Guys have no shame at their game lately. I’m talking about mostly the younger men. When you start talking to a boy nowadays they don’t say: Hey when are we going on a date? Instead they have the audacity to say: When are we gonna chill? So you would be like okay nice, we can chill. What do you wanna do? At least, 8 out of the 10 times the answer will be: Come over at your house. Do you men study that phrase? Girls, you already know that’s like the baddest way to get to know each other. Boys don’t wanna come over at your place, to be chitchatting, obviously (sorry guys, let’s be honest).

The way men keep in touch with women these days is also ridiculous. Most conversations you have will be on WhatsApp. I think i even broke up with a boyfriend once, trough WhatsApp, because the dude didn’t know how to pick up his phone. It’s also because of this App that the late night phone calls are fading away. Instead of talking on the phone till 3 a.m. we are chatting till morning. The hilarious part about this is that, it’s not because guys these days don’t like talking on the phone, but because they don’t have credits to call your ass. Plus talking on the phone means he can’t chat on whatsapp with others at that moment. WhatsApp is a bad way to communicate with one and other. Why? Because you often get misunderstood. Like when you tell someone you’re not interested and what they understand is: ‘I would like you, to be my new stalker.’
With that said, i’d like to give you guys some advice:
1: ‘If you like a girl, i mean really like her, don’t forget the dates. It shows you’re interested in getting to know her. Take a girl out for something to drink or for dinner. Don’t be cheap!

2: Make sure you also have the phone calls, especially the late nights. Girls love that, could be just to hear where your ass is at. If you don’t have credits make sure you both got an App where you can call for free, like Viber (Damn technology ;-)).

Of course there are more tips, but that’s for another blogpost. I tell you guys, such small things can keep a woman happy and not all up in your “business”, and we all know…

 

You don’t want THAT.:-)

 

Love… Bellathe1

 

PS: Zie voor vertaling in het Nederlands: Facebook: Dear Neighbors

What Happened to? #1
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Physical or bigger Force?

 

Dear Neighbors,

I’ve met a guy, and even tho i can smell some “bad” in him from a distance, i still feel this big attraction. From what i’ve heard he’s very loved, so now i’m wondering, what is it about this guy? Is it all physical and sexual attraction (cause his body tho..), or is  there a bigger force at play here? I don’t want to believe that the Almighty wants ME to be with a bad guy, so i’ll go for the physical part.

So here is this guy, trained body, nice hight, his smile got me smiling too and his lips! OMG! Okay now i definitely know it’s something physical. He is like the perfect guy… until he opens his mouth. His voice and accent got me shivering!! Why can’t someone nearly perfect, just have it all?! Why did God give this man such an annoying voice and accent. When a guy calls me at night, i want to hear comfort in his voice, one which soothes you into sleep. Not one who gives you a headache.

I know in advance that this thing won’t work out, i didn’t signed up for this when i was talking to him on WhatsApp. I loved the
“silence” there. But… What if God did send him, and i’m being tested with this voice thing? When we are talking online, everything is perfect. We share the same thoughts and laugh about the same jokes. WhatsApp got people cyber loving, for real.

I don’t know if it’s the same for men, but we women think a lot. We can make whole scenarios in our head (i know you guys know about that). In my head i talk to god a lot, and i do remember me asking for a perfect guy. Although, i know perfection is different in each eye, i’ve got an other image of “perfect” in my head and that image includes a nice and smooth kinda voice. Is that too much asked?

What if he’s perfect for me in God’s eyes…

 

‘Do i need to lower my “perfect” standards?’

 

Love… BellaThe1

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Cheating made Easy…

Dear Neighbors,

I told you guys in an earlier blog about women and cheating. It’s not a secret that besides the men, women are also cheaters. I must say tho’ if men cheat, it’s on “a whole different level”, shit!! The way some guys cheat is a true profession. They just need to get payed for it.

Guys can turn from Mr. Loyal into Mr. Cheater in a matter of seconds. Relationship-issues can be a big trigger for a man to cheat on his woman, but the biggest trigger of all time will still be: ‘The thinking with the dick instead of the head.’ Imagine you as a guy, with a handful of beautiful women in front of you, all ready to trip, fall and land on your dick. Well, ain’t that a bitch ;-).

Since women are trowing themselves on men, it’s not likely that a man will turn them down. I think it can be forgiven if a guy cheats ONCE, like in a one night stand or something (not that i’m the forgiving type of girl), but men nowadays have like a file full of women on their phone and at least half of them are in love with this 1 guy. How is this possible? How can you be thinking it will be all right, for you to have a bunch of women all for yourself? This is like polygamy, only the women are acting Stevie Wonder on it.

Ever since Blackberry, smartphones, Instagram and Snapchat came out, relationships are doomed to fail. What we used to call a “black book”, is called smartphone now, only it’s 10 times worse. You can literally put a code on EVERYTHING, and with the Touch ID on iPhones, there is no need to peek anymore when your boyfriend enters his phone, cause you won’t be seeing anything.

Girls:

  • If you want a serious relationship, you don’t need to search on Instagram at all, cause that’s where all the cheaters are stationed.
  • If your boy is on Snapchat, he’s cheating too! Snapchat is THE most sneakiest app, EVER! It helps you cheat, wtf!
  • If you can’t pick up his phone or have his codes, because of the so called “privacy”, he’s hiding something.

Parents need to be parenting their children better in this thing called ‘relationship’, i believe a father can be a big influence on your norms and values. ‘Too bad a lot of “baby daddy’s” are playing hide and seek’.

Cheating has become so easy to do that we almost can’t blame one other (ALMOST). If you want to blame someone…

 

Blame Society

 

Love… BellaThe1

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Eenmaal op internet, is ALTIJD op internet!

Dear Neighbors,

Instagram en Facebook zijn de nieuwe porno distributeurs als je het mij vraagt. Alleen hoef je tegenwoordig niet meer voor een onsmakelijk filmpje te betalen. We worden als het ware gespamd met sex video’s van meiden en jongens die nou niet bepaald op pornosterren lijken. Sorry jongens, we moeten wel eerlijk blijven. Maar goed, waar gaat dit over?:

Exposing, oftewel Blootstellen.

Ik moet toegeven, ook ik genoot wel eens van de “exposed-instagrams”. De foto’s, daar kon ik nog wel om lachen, maar van de filmpjes aan de andere kant, daar werd ik niet echt vrolijk van. Ik hoef niet te zien hoe twee of meerdere mensen hun dierlijke instinct uitoefenen, bespaar me dat aub. Ik zag op Facebook een filmpje waarin een meisje van 13 een “gangbang” had met een groep jonge jongens. Mijn maag kan serieus omdraaien van zoiets. Waar halen sommige jongens het lef vandaan om zo respectloos met iemands kind om te gaan en alsof je al niet genoeg schade hebt aangericht, zet je zoiets ook nog op INTERNET. Serieus jongens? Maak dan op z’n minst jullie gezichten onherkenbaar.

Niet lang geleden was er ook de “Wraakporno” op Facebook. Ik heb er zelf niks van opgemerkt totdat Peter R. de Vries zich ermee ging bemoeien. Toen dacht ik wel even van: ‘Wow, shit just got real’. Iedereen weet dat als Peter zich ermee gaat bemoeien, het sowieso een showtje wordt. Chantal uit Werkendam had toentertijd een relatie met de “auteur” uit het filmpje, maar hoe vaak zie je dat chickies filmpjes maken met boys waar ze enkel sex mee hebben. Dat is niet meer vragen om problemen, maar om problemen EISEN!

Meiden ik word ook moe van jullie hoor. Ik vraag me serieus af: ‘Hoe dom kan je zijn?’. Niemand is te vertrouwen tegenwoordig, en zulke jongens moet je eigenlijk al op afstand kunnen ruiken. Ze hebben de ‘ik-ben-niet-te-vertrouwen‘ geur, het ruikt een beetje naar hond, duhhh. Ik snap dat het spannend en sexy kan zijn om met je vaste vriend een keer “iets” op video vast te leggen, maar de filmpjes die ik zie zijn ranzige homemade pornografie. Onsmakelijke dingen!!

Jammer dat het mogelijk blijft om zulke dingen online te zetten. Het brengt meer schade dan je lief is. Bedenk dat ook jij later een meisje kan krijgen 😉 en vergeet niet:

 

‘Eenmaal op internet, is ALTIJD op internet’. 

 

Love… BellaThe1

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Do all women cheat?

Dear Neighbors,

Do all women cheat?

Ask a guy and the answer will bE, YES! Ask a women and the answer will be an absolutely: NO! Of course women are not gonna admit that they cheat. We studied the guys we used to date: ‘If you’re girl catches you, deny, deny, deny!’ You guys did too many shaggy on us, with the “it wasn’t me”.

Now the “students” are getting smarter than their teachers and it pisses the boys off!

Who would have thought that women will become better cheaters than men? I’m saying better because it’s not that women cheat more, but we can do it definitely better. If a woman cheat, there is most certainly something wrong with your relationship. It takes more for a woman to be cheating on their man, because women mostly cheat with someone they created feelings for. I personally don’t think all women cheat,… on every man. Attention, i said: ‘on every man’.

Like i said before, it take a lot more for a woman to be cheating on their man. Of course you have the “professional cheaters” among us women who made it a profession to cheat, but that’s another story. Earlier it was not likely for a woman to cheat, especially if you didn’t want to scary the guys away. Back then hoes were not as popular as they are now. Now you see the hoes getting wifed up and guys leaving their “home” for them. ‘You still wonder why you get cheated on guys?

If you are asking me if all women cheat, i will say that it might be possible. Maybe there are some women who never cheated, who can tell? Admitting that you did something wrong, is something mankind will always have a problem with. You might be thinking that i’m a big cheater now, but i have to disappoint you guys :-). I’m totally against cheating. I admit i did it once, with my first boyfriend. I’m not proud of it, but it made me see that it was something i didn’t like and never want to do again.

I feel like everybody is cheating on each other nowadays. You can’t trust a single soul on this, i can promise you that. With everybody playing so reckless with each others hearts, it makes me wonder:

 

‘Does it still matter if you cheat?’

 

Love… BellaThe1

 

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Hard-of-hearing!

Dear Neighbors,

I’m really getting annoyed with the fact that, ‘it’s always the ugliest guy in the room who got the balls to talk to pretty ladies‘. I’m trying to figure this shit out, because don’t you ugly guys get tired of getting “the look”, i mean that nasty look like Nicki Minaj can give you. I don’t know what’s fun about being rejected all the time, but i do know:

‘Rejection gives men some kind of strength to keep on trying.’

Rejection is awful as well for men as for women, we women get rejected too sometimes. Could be that the boy you like is not interested in you. What can you do? Nothing, move on! I think it’s easier for men to reject a woman, cause there are too many women on earth anyway.

Too bad there are men who can’t take a rejection. All women have met them: The guys who call you names after you give them the “look” or a No. It’s funny how fast you can turn from a pretty lady into a “ho” in two seconds.

Then you have guys who think they are “the shit”, but actually look like SHIT. I’m tired of telling guys that they are not my type. I say this when i don’t want to hurt that persons feelings, but this is not working anymore, so what can i do?

– If i’m trying to get rid of ‘em the nice way, they keep trying.

– If i’m ditching them the hard way, they’ll try even harder!!

– If you block them on your phone, they FUCKING GET ANOTHER NUMBER.

It’s really frustrating sometimes, cause what else can you do?

I know we women love to play hard to get, but this “hard to get game” women play, we play that on pretty boys. We do this, just to let them know, they can’t get all women that easy, with their pretty faces. Now this shit is obviously getting misunderstood by ugly boys.

Men, you look stupid trying to persuade a woman to date you, even when she told you she doesn’t want you. Don’t you got love for yourself? Like we say in dutch: “Every little pot has a fitting lid.” So i guess there is also hope for you.

Unfortunately it’s always the ugly guys who act “hard-of-hearing” and not

 

the ONE you actually want.

 

Love… BellaThe1